Blog | It's Me Laura Lee - Part 2

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I don’t know about you, but I take more baths in the winter than I do in the summertime, but when I do take a summer bath, I want it to count.  Know what I mean? I created these bath bombs with Cozy Cashmere fragrance oil and REAL cashmere.   Ingredients: 3 Cups Baking Soda […]

I don’t know about you, but I take more baths in the winter than I do in the summertime, but when I do take a summer bath, I want it to count.  Know what I mean? I created these bath bombs with Cozy Cashmere fragrance oil and REAL cashmere.   Ingredients: 3 Cups Baking Soda […]

The truth is, that I worked myself to the point of exhaustion whereas Tiffani, who isn’t much older than my son, knew how to create boundaries and more importantly, kept them.A couple of years later, all the extra hours I put in didn’t matter. I was being terminated – wrongfully, after being a whistleblower. I even ended up on the front page of the New York Times on New Year’s Day 2018. It was then, that I realized that Tiffani had the right idea.

“Do this race with me,” she said.“ It will be fun,” she said.“ We can bond over it,” she said. I said, “You’re NUTS!”  And, then I signed up.I signed up for a 500K race.  That’s not a typo. 

For those who want the nourishing effects of butters and oils without the fizz of a bath bomb, bath melts or solid bath oils are perfect.  They’re easier to make, too, because they aren’t as finicky as bath bombs.  These bath melts are made with geranium essential oil.  You can substitute an essential oil of your choice.   If you choose to use fragrance oil (FO) instead, be sure to check the recommended usage amount because it will be different. 

We needed the break from each other, and we needed to learn that we wanted each other.  Note that I said ‘want’ and not ‘need.’  I’d rather be wanted than needed.  Having a hard time with that concept? Think about this….God doesn’t need us, but He wants us.  In fact, He seeks us.I want Scott and he wants me. 

I opened my eyes, sleepily.  Looked straight ahead.  Down the hall.  Confused. “Who’s the mom?” That’s the first thing that came to my mind.  My mind.  Mine.
Everything looked somewhat familiar, but I couldn’t place anything.  I had the sense of belonging, but I didn’t know how I belonged.  What was my role?  Who was I?

He put his hands around my neck, gently pressing his thumbs into a notch of my throat.  Demonstrating how someone feels when being choked.  He asked me if I felt it.  I tried to nod. I froze. He was supposed to be an ally.  I came to him for help.

THE “R” WORD   I couldn’t breathe.  I was using my inhaler religiously, but still, I couldn’t breathe.  I wasn’t wheezing, but I was short of breath and coughing.  It was reminiscent of my bouts of pneumonia.  I was using the inhaler more often than I should have been, yet, still, I couldn’t breathe.  I […]

This bath bomb smells so divine!  Toasted coconut with lime! And, the coconut milk gives it extra, extra, extra, foaming ability.   You can tweak the lime essential oil and the witch hazel depending on whether you’d like a stronger lime scent – just keep the total to 2 ounces.  I found ½ ounce of lime essential oil just enough to allow the coconut scent to come through, too.  You get the coconut scent from the flour and milk.

What will truly be the hardest days are yet to come.  My weight gain, in part, was a defense mechanism against future sexual assaults.  My rational brain knows that rape and sexual assault isn’t about sex, but rather about control, but my irrational brain tells me that if I’m undesirable, I’m safe.  This may be why it was so hard to lose three pounds.  And, this is why my therapist and I will have a lot of work to do as I start losing the weight.  I’m ready to take back control.

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Laura Lee, 52, with invisible wounds and scars.  I've learned to embrace PTSD and depression because if I don't own them, they'll own me.  I don't want to simply survive, but to thrive.  I hope you'll join me on my journey.  It's sure to be a bumpy road.

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