Once you realize you’ve spent too much time saying yes to the wrong things, it’s normal to feel trapped. You feel as if you can’t back out now. You might worry that everyone will think you’re a quitter or that you’ll let the people around you down. But continuing with an external yes when you’re feeling an internal no is a sure recipe for burn out, exhaustion, and crankiness.
It’s tempting to believe that if you say no to that next event or opportunity that the world will somehow collapse. But the truth is that “no” rarely means we miss out—it’s often the opposite. By saying no, we get to create more of what we want in life. If you’re having trouble with this word, here are just a few of the amazing things benefits you can expect when you use your “no” more often…
It is easy during a crisis to spend all of your time bemoaning what you want to be different. For example, my mom has been diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer – her 5th time with a cancer diagnosis and she’s been on chemo treatment the entire time. I didn’t know until just as Covid-19 was making it’s appearance and it was decided it was best I didn’t visit for fear that I might be a carrier of coronavirus or something else. It would be easy at this point to spend my time regretting all the time I’ve missed together since I live 3000 miles away and to be quite honest, sometimes I do, but it does me no good.
Understand that any time you face a crisis, it can be overwhelming. You may find yourself struggling with what to do next and that’s completely normal. But the important thing is you take action, avoid victim thinking, refuse to recue others, and focus on making clear-headed decisions.